"Move on," "let go," "set it free."  "If it was meant to be it will return."  We've all heard these sayings but are we able to actually consider that when something suddenly happens to us? Well, that's a different story.

Recently, a job I've had for over four years has been discontinued as the current economic downturn has affected the workplace.  It was not only my job that was terminated, but all jobs surrounding my position except for Head Office. I really enjoyed that position I held there - well duh, I lasted there for more than four years! I was saddened by the unexpected loss of my job and realized that I, too, now in a way fall under that unemployment category that so many people are facing today with the economic crisis (although I have another part-time job... two part-time jobs equaled a full-time job in my eyes!).  It was so sudden, unexpected, I didn't know what to do but cry and feel this emptyness.  I felt like everything in my world was moving in a slow pace and I felt stuck.  In the words of Bella Swan from the Twilight Saga, "New Moon," when describing her breakup with Vampire lover, Edward Cullen she says, "it is as if someone punched my chest in and I now have a hole in my heart."  Hm, now reflecting back on that book, she went months feeling this way and it actually made me believe that she had a serious form of depression that wasn't solely from the breakup itself.  Okay bad example, anyway!

I know there will be another path for me to take.  This isn't the end of the world as I have a great job elsewhere in a field I am interested in and very happy to be working there (although it is part-time, three days a week).  Among that, I have the tremendous support of friends and family who understand that this difficult time is quite upsetting and have been a great sounding board for me. I just feel stuck in a rut at this moment with the loss of such a great job that was part of my life for so long. I know I will have to let go, but until then, this is the sad journey I must overcome. Eventually I will find what I am looking for. Eventually.

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